Daily Thoughts

April 13, 2017

I had the privilege of sitting with a client today who reminded me that courage isn’t about one big courageous act. Courage is about making consecutive brave choices that build up over time.  I have been able to witness this individual struggle with their pain, family dynamics and triggers. And each new act of courage leads to new awareness, understanding, and peace.  It is another beautiful reminder to stay present in the moment and simply do the next right thing.

April 6, 2017

Knowing when to let go of worry is unclear, but the truth is, worry has no clear power.

April 3, 2017

Have you ever thought about what it means to be brave?  For many of us it involves doing something big, heroic even. We often look to others to validate our actions, comments or thoughts.  We have these grand ideas, thoughts and beliefs about what it means to be brave.  But what if the bravest thing that we can do is wrestle with our stories?  The story that we create about who we are and our worthiness.  What if being brave means turning our focus away from others and turning inward?  What if being brave means wrestling with the voices in your head? You know those voices... the ones that try to tell you that you are not enough. Those voices that try to convince you that you should or shouldn’t be doing this or that.  What if being brave is learning to say “I am a hot mess some days and that is enough!” or simply “I am enough.” As we grow in our awareness and maturity, we may find that our definitions of bravery are much more subtle, yet much more vulnerable. Regardless of the form our...

March 29, 2017

March 27, 2017

Parenting…possibly the most challenging job on the planet. We nurture and grow these small, completely dependent creatures into functional and independent humans. If we do our jobs well, our children leave us and create their own lives.  As parents, we invest in our kids by protecting (keeping them safe), teaching and loving them.  At what point do we begin to step back and allow our kids to travel their own paths?  My daughter recently told me that she is no longer a kid and that, while she doesn’t want to hurt me, she would like less teaching and more listening. This took my breath away for a minute.  Then I realized, I was still trying to protect her which she didn’t need.  It was time for me to let go and trust that everything she needs already dwells within her.  I know there will be times of disappointment, failure and success in store for her and it is not my job to protect her from what may or may not happen. My job is and continues to be helping her RISE.  Life is full of obst...

February 28, 2017

They teach us that life isn’t about control but rather being fluid and staying in the moment. Through their eyes the world is a magical place, and if we can only sit with them in that wonder for a minute, we might see the magic too.

February 8, 2017

I watched Ashley Judd’s TED talk and was struck by how some use social media to wound others, and the impact of that abuse has in causing trauma and triggering past traumas. It is so important for us to be mindful of how we talk to strangers, acquaintances, coworkers, friends, families and ourselves. If we are using language that we would not want used on someone we love, then we need to pause and take responsibility of what we are feeling. Often times our own woundedness is what strikes out at others. One of the phrases Ashley said toward the end of her talk is “trauma not transformed will be trauma transferred”. Let’s work together to transform the trauma and end the transference.

** PLEASE NOTE: THE VIDEO MAY NOT BE SUITABLE FOR ALL VIEWERS. IT INCLUDES STRONG LANGUAGE AND DEPICTIONS OF SEXUAL VIOLENCE.**

 

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Corporate Woods

9401 Indian Creek Pkwy, Suite 515

Building 40

Overland Park, KS  66210

melissaktherapy@gmail.com

Tel: (913) 543-1404

© 2020 by Melissa D. Kincheloe Therapy, LLC.